November 27, 2004

Thanksgiving by the numbers

In 3 nights:

  • 5.5: hours spent traveling from Ann Arbor to South Haven
  • 2.5: hours it should take to travel from Ann Arbor to South Haven
  • 4: people actually worth seeing in South Haven
  • 1: unwed teenage pregnancies discovered
  • 10: approximate pounds of food eaten
  • plethora: number of shrimp eaten
  • 4: shrimp that will probably kill me
  • 10: approximate glasses of wine drank
  • 3: nights spent in the hot tub with a glass of wine
  • 4: showers in the last 2 days
  • 1: compliment on smelling good
  • 1/2: inches grown since summer
  • 6: approximate weight lost in pounds since summer
  • 1: resolutions made, because of last two items, to use exercise facilities at my job at Intel to overcome my overactive metabolism
  • 0: chance of resolution to exercise actually happening
  • 2: number of foxes I saw at night on the public beach
  • 1: number of times I actually needed my camera
  • 1: number of times I actually needed my camera that I forgot my camera
  • 1: sweet ancient BMW’s ridden in
  • 25: dollars spent on gas
  • 20: pounds per square inch of pressure in my tires after sitting around since summer
  • 2: times I got to say “nice hair” and mean it
  • 2: abusive husbands (counting liberally) I talked to
  • 3: important realizations made
  • 3: depressing important realizations made
  • 5: computer related questions receieved (counting conservatively)
  • 3: times I felt like hot shit for having one of the best jobs someone my age can have
  • 1: crazy things done with expensive technology and zip lock bags that only a nerd of my caliber would do
  • 0/5: ratio of classes that didn’t assign annoyingly long homework assignments over break
  • 0: homework assignments I’ve looked at
  • 39: emails received when I finally got around to checking
  • 1: significant emails receieved
  • 1: books read
  • 3: loads of laundry done
  • 10: approximate trips through downtown South Haven
  • 0: worthwhile trips through downtown South Haven
  • 10: approximate times I listened to the album Pressure Chief
  • 0: times I got out of bed before noon
  • 1: times I was awake before noon long enough to be pissed that someone would call me before noon
  • 1: supposedly true stories involving people with peg legs and eye patches, a model titanic and battleship, anti-dutch and anti-Wall Street sentiments
  • 1: happy Thanksgiving
Posted by MrWonton at 3:12 am |

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Collapse Comment by Barbi
2004-11-29 17:15:18

1,900 dollars spent on LV for Barbi
Because you love me.
I’ll help a little
School computers=clicking on Levi’s links to show my love.

Collapse Comment by MrWonton
2004-11-29 18:11:39

2 dollars for the cause! Good thing you’re helping, or $1,900 might seem like a lot of money.

Collapse Comment by Verdonk
2004-11-30 12:02:43

god you’re hot

Collapse Comment by MrWonton
2004-11-30 17:02:39

Nice of you to notice. You made the list of people worth seeing, even though I NEVER DID. Damn recluse. There’ll be none of that over winter break. Thats all we get for 8 months. And it disgusts me how much money you made playing poker. Seriously. Disgusting.

Collapse Comment by Brandy
2004-12-02 18:05:17

I envy your collective data…I am a malfunctioning robot…did I mention that I envy your collective data?

Collapse Comment by MrWonton
2004-12-02 21:52:41

I envy your pink hair.

Collapse Comment by b-a-r-b-i
2005-04-20 11:10:35

I think the “blogging” ad’s may cause your customers to click on them and then switch to a different product meaning they are a threat to your business. You should put them on your ad block list or whatever its called so they don’t show up on your pages and cause you lost sales. GET IT? I do.

Collapse Comment by MrWonton
2005-04-20 12:11:09

Wow… I’m so depressed that I didn’t think of that. You’re a friggin genius.

Collapse Comment by Coralyn
2012-02-14 20:58:32

Geez, that’s unbeliveable. Kudos and such.

Collapse Comment by hbqzcqfgal
2012-02-16 01:45:27

jJfBdr sralawujsupq

Collapse Comment by zudkfybbwmr
2012-02-17 04:56:59

wFZs7O twuqotqaqghq

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